Your child’s behavior is the same way. Acting out is large and frightening and seems out of control- and the first this we want to do is control it. But- and this is huge, maybe control is not what the behavior needs- maybe it needs a secure place to play out, then the child can process the feelings that cause the outburst. The information that hides at the end of the behavior is the most important- read to the end– talk or draw or play.
Be patient with yourself and your child; set limits- read to the end. Behavior is an article, there is incredible information- about independence, fear, learning, expectations, tiredness- and in the heat of the moment, reading to the end is hard.
Sometimes an article is worth sharing- same with your child’s behavior- verbalize what you are seeing “Something about your homework is making you angry”, “Today made you tired, I can see you need a place to be sad”, “I understand that you are upset, you can have 5 minutes to yourself, but we need to get ready to go to dance class after that”.
Read to the end– a child who is given limits and understanding, a place for secure emotional exploration and regulation and love becomes a compassionate human. Here’s the surprise- the behavior article might be a very long read- even years long- but the results are fantastic- a child who can read to themselves to the end!